Update: I asked Robert Charleston of OneLoneEnglishman.com to read this list because Englishmen make any list sound more official and legit. Also, I really wanted to hear him say “fo shizzle.” Yeah, that’s pretty much the reason. 
Have a listen here.
Howdy, little dove!
Yeah, so, like 20 years ago it would have been marvelously helpful if some sparkly fairy godmother or glow-y guardian angel showed up with the following list in hand. And peppermint ice cream. That would have been muy, muy awesome.
At least I can share the list with YOU. I’m not sparkly or glow-y but that’s okay
- Grownups are stupid.
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Your one duty in life is to take good care of yourself. That is all.
- With all your heart, love strong and love smart. Love isn’t covering up for grownups who need help.
- “Normal” doesn’t exist, despite what you see on screen.
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Nothing good comes from worrying.
- Spend time only with those who make you feel like you. The rest of them aren’t worth it.
- Avoid regrets. Listen to your nagging gut feeling. It’s there for a reason.
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You’re going to have an AMAZING life because you’re going to make it happen. Embrace those who tell you this. Ignore the ones who don’t.
- Hope unlocks happiness. Love it and you’ll have a high-def view of the world. Most people have a static-y black and white view.
- Care little about what other kids think or say about you. 99% of them will be stupid grownups, for sure.
If you have alcoholic parents or if you’ve been affected by someone’s drinking or drug problems, here are the most important things to know:
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One in four kids has a drug or alcohol-addicted parent. Yup. There are more alcoholic moms and dads in the U.S. than those with cancer or any other disease.
- It’s not your fault. You can’t cause a parent or other loved one to drink or do drugs.
- You can’t control it. No matter what you do or say, you can’t make them stop drinking or doing drugs. They have to want to get help.
- There’s only one thing you can control: Your own well being. If you’re not safe, find a grownup you trust to help you change that.
Shooby doo wop. I want you to know…
You are awesome-tastic, smart-alous and strong-ful way beyond your years.
A little bit louder now…
YOU rock.
[...] 10 things grownups don’t tell you but totally should [...]
Oh my goodness. This is so wonderful (said with an English accent) Jody.
I wish I had this Englishman walking next to me all day long. I would spend my entire day coming up with new things for him to say.
I think I might have held a smile for the entire audio.
Hi Izzy,
Hahaha! I know, me too.
Glad you enjoyed it.
P.S. I wonder if Robert had to google “fo shizzle.”
hi jody, i love what you’re doing and i loved this post. it shows how much we all have in common and how same we are in that we all go through tough things in life and that no ones life is perfect. Everyone should accept themselves for who they are, love themselves and try to be as positive as they can be. Alcoholism is a problem and Im so glad that you took your experiences and wrote the book you wrote and are trying to help kids out. Stay strong and I hope you live a happy life
Neha,
Thank you for such a wonderful note! You’re right. No one’s life is perfect. Sometimes, while scrolling through news feeds and watching TV, it sure does seem like everyone’s got it made. The reality is we’re all VERY alike and we all share the same struggles, albeit with some minor variations.
I hope you have a fantastically happy life, too!